Our tooth route will follow the path of a monarch who offered his kingdom for a horse and his soul for the relief of his toothache. A visiting little mermaid fled from an inebriated Edinburgh dinner-party shocked by what Queen Victoria later found to be riotously amusing. This less-trodden Camino will linger past archaeology, anthropology, criminology and even forensic odontology guided, not by Santiago's pilgrim scallop shell, but by St Apollonia's emblematic tooth, following the surgical genius who made thermometers for hibernating hedgehogs and who discovered a race of Irish giants. During the Stuart dynasty, dental sepsis was the fifth commonest cause of death. Small wonder England has 55 churches dedicated to Apollonia, patroness of what Robert Burns called "the hell of all diseases". These days NHS dentists are hard to find, but U3AC is offering appointments now. Apollonia looks forward to filling your imagination in January.